Need to vent...

Since this is my personal blog, I just want to vent for a minute. I am not married and don't have children. One day I would like both of those dreams to come true. Right now (today) my feelings are hurt and I just need to vent. Last year I started dating my best friends' brother. We make a great team, but he is just not THE ONE. We are still friends and I still hang out with him and his family. After all, his sister is my best friend.
Well, in April I met my best friend's (another one) cousin. He introduced himself and asked for my number. He lives out of state and I knew he would be leaving. However, he is back and what I thought would be  a great summer of being able to spend time with him isn't turning into what I thought.
I have tried so hard to not let the things of my past to continue to affect how I treat men. But some just make it so hard. I want to be able to trust and simply live for the moment in the relationship. Right now, my feelings are hurt and I am questioning myself.
Sorry this post is so out of the norm for me.